Rafa’s 20 New Year Resolutions

1. I will take an occasional break from writing notes during games and drink more water to try and avoid a repeat of kidney stones.

2. I will try and realise that 4-4-2 is more effective than 4-5-1.

3. I will use Insua more often during Premier League games.

4. I will not use Ngog so often during Premier League games.

5. I will get rid of Andrei Voronin at last.

6. I will stop playing 2 defensive midfielders at home against relegation fodder.

7. I will realise that it was a mistake to consider Xabi Alonso expendable and not try and sell him again.

8. I will keep the goatee because it makes me look a bit meaner, like Fagin’s smarter brother.

9. I will stop spending vast sums of money on players nobody has heard of, especially on left-backs.

10. I will put poor Dirk Kuyt back in the centre where he belongs and buy a proper right winger.

11. I will stop being so polite to Alex Ferguson and learn to despise Man Utd like all proper Liverpool fans.

12. I will not play reserve teams in the FA Cup this year.

13. I will stop being so bitter about Michael Owen leaving when I arrived at Anfield and realise that £3M to get him back is an absolute steal.

14. I will continue to be a tactical genius in the Champions League and get to more finals in 5 years than the Mancs have managed in 35 years.

15. I will send Yossi Benayoun to the gym to work out.

16. I will try and buy Glen Johnson and Aaron Lennon in the transfer window.

17. I will remember to hide my Tom Hicks voodoo doll in case the cleaner finds it.

18.I will lie down in the middle of the East Lancs road rather than see Torres sold to Man City.

19. I will treat Nick Clemons to a game of golf and pick his brains on my strategy for the summer transfer window.

20. I will win the Premier League.

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